Recently I was in LA giving a keynote on The Art & Business of Retreats, and someone in the audience asked:

“What should I look for in a co-host?”

My immediate answer?

“Don’t.”

The room laughed. Then I gave the real answer.

But that question took me straight back to some painful and expensive lessons in my own retreat business. So if you’re considering a co-host, read this carefully.

Partnerships can elevate your retreat business – or quietly destroy it.

Let’s talk about both.

The Hard Lessons I Learned About Retreat Business Partnerships

At the beginning of my retreat business, I partnered with someone I thought was a perfect fit.

She said all the right things.
It felt aligned.
It seemed exciting.

Then I started noticing odd details.  Things happening in my Facebook account that was flagging (there was ONLY Facebook at that time). 

Content was appearing quickly. Polished. Impressive. A little too fast.

When I asked about it, she would say, “I’ve been working on this for a long time.”

Something didn’t sit right.

Then one day, I received an email to my personal inbox that said something along the lines of:

“Your content looks just like mine…”

I checked.

It did.

I was devastated.

I confronted my partner. She backpedaled. Said she used others’ content for research. Said it was inspiration. Said a lot of things.

That email – along with fraudulent charges that later appeared on my credit card – taught me a brutal lesson about trust, due diligence, and how quickly things can unravel in a retreat business.

Not All Retreat Business Partnerships End in Disaster – But Some End in Disappointment

I’ve had other partnerships that weren’t fraudulent. They just didn’t work.

One in particular started beautifully. Great energy. Shared excitement. Big plans.

But over time, we didn’t see eye to eye.

Vision shifted. Priorities changed. Communication strained.

The ending was difficult.

Not explosive. Not dramatic. Just painful and draining.

And I’ve also had partnerships that were fine. Not terrible. Not amazing. Just… fine.

And in business, “fine” is rarely worth the complexity.

So Should You Have a Co-Host in Your Retreat Business?

Sometimes yes.  Often no.

If you’re considering a co-host because:

• You’re nervous to do it alone
• You think it will make marketing easier
• You feel like you “should” collaborate
• You’re overwhelmed

That’s not a reason to partner.  That’s a reason to build support systems.

A co-host is not an assistant.
A co-host is not a safety blanket.
A co-host is not a marketing shortcut.

A co-host is a shared leadership position in your retreat business.

My 3-Step Vetting System for Retreat Business Partnerships

Now my partnerships are solid. Not because I got lucky – but because I got structured.

Here’s the system I use.

1. Do I Know Their Full History? (And Can They Prove Their Work?)

This is not about stalking someone’s Instagram.

It’s about verifying credibility.

I look for:

• What have they actually built?
• What proof exists of their work?
• Can I see testimonials?
• Can I speak to people who’ve worked with them?
• Is their content original?

If someone is vague about their background, that’s a red flag.

In a retreat business partnership, reputation becomes shared. If theirs collapses, so does yours.

2. Have We Met in Person and Do We Have Real Energetic Alignment?

Zoom chemistry is not the same as real-life energy.

Have you:

• Spent time together in person?
• Seen how they handle stress?
• Observed how they interact with others?
• Experienced how they manage conflict?

Retreats are high-pressure environments.

Travel delays happen. Guests have emotional moments. Logistics go sideways.

You need to know how this person responds under stress & ensure you both have effective boundaries in place.

Energetic alignment isn’t just about liking each other. It’s about leadership compatibility.

3. Are Roles and Contracts Crystal Clear in the Retreat Business Agreement?

If 1 and 2 are solid, then comes structure.

You must define:

• Who handles marketing?
• Who handles finances?
• Who speaks during sessions?
• Who makes final decisions?
• How profits are split?
• What happens if one person wants out?
• Who owns the email list?
• Who owns the intellectual property?

And it must be in writing.

Friendship is not a contract.

Clarity prevents resentment.

In a retreat business, blurred roles lead to tension fast.

When a Co-Host Makes Sense in a Retreat Business

There are moments when partnership is powerful:

• You have complementary expertise (logistics + facilitation, for example)
• You are entering a new market and need local presence
• You are scaling into larger events that require dual leadership
• You both have established audiences that truly align

But even then, structure comes first.  Excitement comes second.

And sometimes it isn’t a partnership needed, but a contractor.  It is important to know the difference. 

What I Tell Retreat Leaders Now

If you can build and lead your retreat business solo first, do that.

Prove you can:

• Sell it
• Deliver it
• Refine it
• Profit from it

Then, if you choose to partner, you’re partnering from strength – not dependence.

The strongest collaborations I’ve had came after I built my foundation.

Final Thought on Co-Hosting in a Retreat Business

Partnership can double your impact.

It can also double your problems.

Choose slowly. Vet thoroughly. Contract clearly.

And never ignore your gut.

Your retreat business is your leadership in action. Protect it accordingly.

If you want to go deeper into building a structured, sustainable retreat business – including partnerships, pricing, legal foundations, and scalable strategy – join us at the Retreat Industry Forum.

That room is built for leaders who want to grow wisely, not recklessly.

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Listen in on this special edition of the Retreat Leaders Podcast as we pull back the curtain on the evolving energy of the Retreat Industry Forum & see why YOU should be there with us.